Monday, May 3, 2010

Hey Seth, David Faustino Called and He Wants His Career Back








I recently read that Seth Green got married.


And, I thought to myself... "The Married With Children guy is married... wonder if children are on the way, haha"

Then it dawned on me... Seth Green was never on Married With Children, that was David Faustino.

HOLY SHIT, Seth Green stole David Faustino's career! Not that it is any big deal, I mean, I think it's safe to say that as far as Hollywood goes neither Faustino nor Green have set the world on fire, but if I was Faustino, I'd be pissed.

Faustino hit it big with Married With Children that ran from 1987 - 1997, over 200 episodes. He played the hopeless loser son of Al and Peggy Bundy. A failure in every one's eyes but his own.

Green stole that role and ran with it; Austin Powers (x3 - loser son of Dr. Evil), Can't Hardly Wait (loser kid trying to get laid), Enemy of the State (loser computer geek), Knockaround Guys (loser friend of mafia guys), Scooby-Doo 2 (not sure who he played, but it's Scooby-Effin-Doo he's a loser), Old Dogs (don't know on this either, but in the trailer he's being fondled by a gorilla, nuff said). And, countless others. Try, no really, try as hard as you can to think of movie where Seth Green isn't a loser.

Since 1997 Faustino has been in... absolutely nothing worth mentioning.

Green took Faustino's character and capitalized on it. Take Bud Bundy and insert him into any character ever played by Seth Green. It's the same f***ing character. There is absolutely no difference.
While Faustino has fallen into near total obscurity Green is getting mentioned on the websites of E Online, TV Guide, and the Los Angeles Times for just getting married.

Did you know that Faustino got married in 2004, divorced in 2006, sued his ex to not have to pay spousal support, and in 2007, following an argument with his ex, was arrested for marijuana possession and intoxication and later the charges were dropped because he went to rehab? No. That's because Seth Green stole his motherf***ing career!

I think it should also be noted: Both are short, both have shitty mussed up hair, both Faustino and Green do cartoon voice overs... Faustino does characters on Batman, Scooby-Doo, and Robot Chicken... but it is Green that everyone knows as the voice from the Family Guy. Oh, and both appeared on Entourage playing themselves... I remember Greens role because he had beef with E... but, sadly, I don't remember Faustino's role and I've seen every episode.

That is the epitome of this story.

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